✨ Oh I can’t wait to share with you this month about perfectionism. It’s such a juicy topic. I wonder how many of you are sitting reading this and thinking oh I’m not perfectionist? Hands up if that’s you. Well have I got news for you!
I never thought of myself as a perfectionist until I was coached by someone at, the beginning of my business journey. It came as a bit of surprise to have this label.
I was procrastinating about putting my website up, which was a fabulous website, however I was struggling with the written content. So she suggested to me that if I put it up now and it was 80% perfect in my eyes then that was okay. What a breakthrough moment for me. Of course, it was 80% okay so up it went the next day. Why was I procrastinating about it – because I feared putting myself out there for the whole wide web to see me. Was this a belief that I wanted to hold onto? Not really - so up it went.
In psychology, perfectionism is a belief that perfection should be strived for. In its pathological form, perfectionism is an unhealthy belief where anything less than perfect is unacceptable.
So let's look at belief, self-belief in particular. The definition I like is:
"A proven and reliable connection to the understanding that we can and will walk our chosen path in life.”
The things that get in the way of us putting ourselves out there are Fear/Doubt/Disbelief:
Fear of the unknown
Doubt in our abilities
Holding onto previous failures
I love using the Inner Tennis Match with my clients, have you heard of it?
The higher self sends high values dreams into consciousness: the serve.
The conditioned self sends reasons why the dream can’t happen eg: fear/doubt/disbelief: the return.
This game can last for years inside our heads.
What are your fears/doubts/disbeliefs specifically? Human beings are high precision machines and the subconscious mind only has our best intentions at heart. We can achieve the greatest things with this understanding and what does that look like for you?
Ask yourself this question: If I could do anything I wanted to do what would it be?
So what are the issues?
Our past getting in the way, a lack of clarity about what we want in the future, overthinking, and procrastination.
The tools that are best designed to work with this are:
Positive self-talk (affirmations)
No go ahead and enjoy life without perfectionism.